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15 July 2008 @ 03:08 pm
Fic: I've Learned To Love - 2/?  
Title: I've Learned To Love (2/?)
Authors: titheniel & fallonblackdays
Characters/Pairings: Steve Carlson/Christian Kane, Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Disclaimers: It's all pretending. We don't own these people, they own themselves, and we sure don't claim to know any of them. None of this ever happened.
Beta: the awesome dea_liberty *beams* Thanks so much girl! ♥
Word count: 4,724
Summary: Life and its many bumps teach the boys how to love. (many apologies about the sucky summary, but so many things happen in this story that we found it utterly impossible to write a detailed one :P)

Previous chapters:

Chapter One

Steve felt better than he had in days. He was actually humming to himself as he pulled up in front of Chris' place. The thought of them finally telling Jensen and Jared about their relationship had put him in a good mood, something the guys from the band seemed to appreciate. He made a mental note to make it up to all of them for his earlier bitchiness.

The fact was Steve couldn't help but hope that maybe telling someone would make Chris more confident about the whole let's-spread-the-word thing. Maybe - just maybe - Chris would see his point: telling actually made it more real - and made them a lot stronger.

He grabbed the two six packs out of the trunk and let himself in with his spare keys, patting his pocket to make sure that the thing he’d bought earlier was still there.

"You're gonna end up really fucking spoiling us with all this cooking," he said as he walked into the kitchen. The food smelled so good it seemed to go straight to his stomach, which growled on cue.

"At least you get a decent meal once in a while," Chris retorted, turning his head to catch Steve's lips with his own. "Welcome," he whispered when he pulled back, a warm look in his eyes.

Steve snorted, putting the beers down on the table. "I never starve, you know? I know how to cook. In fact, I taught you how to cook."

"Well, you never exactly eat properly, either; you’re always too lazy to cook." Chris washed his hands quickly, checking the oven to make sure the pork was still roasting away happily, and turned to face Steve with a crooked smile. "C'mere," he said, beckoning him closer.

"Since when do you have any complaints about my body?" Steve grinned, going willingly, resting his hands on Chris' hips.

Chris tugged him closer roughly, pressing their whole bodies together.

"Abso-fucking-lutely nothing," he ground out, just savoring the contact for a moment, loving the way Steve's strong hands gripped him almost possessively. He smiled up at Steve, feeling a warmth spread from his stomach to every part of his body. Maybe they were back on track. He leaned forward, found Steve's parted lips and covered them with his own in an unhurried kiss. He needed to enjoy the moment and relish the quietness after the ups and downs of the last few weeks.

Steve kissed him back slowly, licking at Chris’ mouth as if he had never tasted it before. He felt like he hadn't; Chris' lips had tasted bitter over the last few weeks.

When they pulled apart, he let his fingers linger in Chris' hair, before his soft smile turned into a full grin.

"I got you something," he announced, digging into his back pocket and handing a small pouch over to Chris. "I know you’ve got a couple of these already," he rambled on, pulling back slightly and scratching the back of his neck in embarrassment. "But I saw it and it just made me... um... It kinda... It looked like it was made for you, so I... um... yeah," he finished lamely.

Chris took the pouch, obviously confused, and opened it. The beautiful stones that fell from the bag gleamed in the dying light of the sun that slipped through the open window. The leather was black and dusted with white mother-of-pearl seashells. It was absolutely perfect.

He looked up from the bracelet to Steve, who was still fidgeting in front of him, and he cursed inwardly as his stomach knotted and he couldn’t breathe. He held out his wrist, one end of the bracelet in his hand and the other hanging loose, hoping that Steve would put it on for him. He was shaking so hard he was almost scared of breaking it.

Steve smiled at him and took the offered item, securing the bracelet around Chris' wrist almost reverently. When he was done, he dropped his hand and grinned up at him.

"See? Perfect. I knew it."

"You are," Chris muttered, still staring at the almost sensual way the leather hugged his wrist. He lifted his eyes, bringing his hand up to cup Steve's cheek. "You are perfect."

The color of the stones seemed to bring out Steve's eyes, making them deeper and clearer. He bit the inside of his cheek to stop himself from saying it and officially becoming the girl of this relationship.

"Thank you," he said instead, his fingertips grazing lovingly over Steve's cheekbone. He tilted his lover's head down to kiss him again, touching only their lips together at first, chaste and sweet, before the heat of Steve's body got the better of him. He worked Steve's lips open with his tongue, keeping him firmly in place with his hand in Steve’s hair, the bracelet tingling as he threaded his fingers through the blonde strands.

'God, I love you, Chris,' Steve thought dazedly as he surrendered to Chris' lips, wrapping his arms around his waist and clutching Chris to him. He didn't say it though; he knew it was too soon and neither of them was ready for the consequences and implications of those words.

If it wasn't for the fact that it was already five to seven and Jensen did have a spare set of keys, Chris thought he could probably have Steve naked and under him in five seconds flat, give or take. It was almost creepy how hot and frenzied everything about Steve always made him. The hold Steve seemed to have on him was scarier still.

He pulled reluctantly back, and the lower part of his body made sure he knew it wasn't happy with that at all.

"Fuck, you drive me insane," he panted, leaning his forehead against Steve.

Steve chuckled. "Good to know, Kane," he said, patting Chris' nape affectionately.

The doorbell chose that moment to ring, and Chris groaned. Loudly.

"Fuckin' knew it," he muttered, disentangling himself from Steve's hold to march to the front door. "Couldn't you have just let yourself in, you jerk?" he said as he pulled it open with a broad smirk.

"Well, awesome to see you too, Chris." Jensen glared, even though a grin was tugging at his lips.

"I'm cooking," Chris retorted, but he was already opening his arms, welcoming Jensen with the customary it's-been-four-months hug.

"Like I don't know Steve’s already here; his jeep’s parked outside," Jensen said, hugging back. "Missed you like hell, you idiot," he murmured so only Chris would hear.

Chris smiled against Jensen's shoulder, arms tightening. "Same here, man." He pulled back, holding Jensen at arm's length, studying him. "You look like shit," he said, before he turned to the taller man hovering in the background. "Jare." He let go of Jensen to hug Jared too. "What kind of hours have you guys been working? You look beat."

Jensen shrugged. "I'm okay," he said. "Jay here's doing worse." He slipped his arm around his boyfriend's waist.

Jared tried to smile but it looked awkward, like he had jaw lock or something. "'s nothing," he said, but Chris noticed how he leaned against Jensen, like if Jensen moved away he'd just fall over. "Had some rough shoots."

Chris' eyes narrowed and turned to Jensen, silently but clearly saying, 'You're telling me every. Fucking. Thing later.'

"Sure," was what he actually said to Jared, beckoning them forward. "And yeah, Steve's already here. I left him alone in the kitchen and, on second thought, that was probably a mistake. I think we might be eating leftovers."

Jensen laughed, tightening his hold around Jared. "You okay?" he whispered into Jared’s ear as they followed Chris into the living room. "You wanna go home? It's okay, you know; they'd understand."

"No. I said I'm fine," Jared whispered through clenched teeth. He'd be damned if he ruined Jensen's night with his friends, especially when Jensen had been practically bouncing since the call on Friday night, and kept wondering aloud what the mysterious announcement Chris and Steve had to make was.

"Okay," Jensen nodded, planting a quick butterfly kiss on his jaw.

"Holy shit, guys. You look like hell!" was Steve's greeting when they walked in.

"And that is what I call a friendly greeting," Jared snorted, giving Steve’s shoulder a squeeze, even though Jensen was almost supporting him. "You look disgustingly rested. It's not fair," he added, turning to Chris. "You should have had the decency to show a bit of strain at least."

"We're not chasing ghosts around all day." Steve grinned, returning Jensen's embrace awkwardly, completely distracted with watching Chris. "Great to see you too, Jen," he said gruffly, patting Jensen’s back.

Jensen released him, rolling his eyes. "Whatever," he snorted. "Can we sit down please?"

"Make yourselves at home." Chris smiled, starting to dish out the first course. He glanced over his shoulder. "Steve, mind making yourself useful for once?" he called, nodding to the plates he was filling up with pasta. "I haven't grown extra hands."

"You're always going on about how you don't want anyone to mess with your cooking," Steve retorted as he moved to help. He filled up a huge plate, setting it down in front of Jared. "Here, Jay, you look like you need it."

Jared tried to grin, thanking Steve, but he didn't move to touch the food.

Chris looked pointedly at Jensen as he gave him his own plate. It wasn't like Jensen was looking that much better, but at least he didn't look like he was about to throw up on the table.

He walked back to the stove as Steve was reaching for his own plate. Chris caught his eyes and gave him a 'what the hell?' look, jerking his head almost imperceptibly to the table. Steve shook his head, clearly confused and worried himself.

Jensen took advantage of the two of them being out of earshot to lean towards Jared. "Jay, I think we should really go home," he said worriedly, reaching out to massage his lover's scalp.

"I said no way. Jen… Please just… Let it go, okay?" Jared mumbled, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his hand. "You know it'll get better."

"Alright," Jensen murmured, fingers lingering in Jared’s hair for a few more moments before he reluctantly let his hand fall back into his lap.

"So," he said after everyone had sat down. "What do you guys have to tell us?"

Steve almost choked on his mouthful.

Chris started to cough himself even though he hadn't started eating yet. He glanced at Steve’s rapidly flushing face and started to laugh. "Jesus. That was straightforward, Jen. I'm surprised."

Jensen shrugged. "I've been dying to know for days."

Chris looked back at Steve, giving him a sly smile as he reached for Steve’s hand under the table, their bracelets clinking as they laced their fingers together on Steve's knee.

"Uh… Yeah, well, we’d kinda hoped we'd get through dinner first."

"Oh." Jensen's face fell. "Okay, I'll wait, then."

Steve was sure he had forgotten how to talk; no sound seemed to want to come out of his mouth anymore.

"No, no, it's okay." Chris smiled, squeezing Steve's hand reassuringly. He hesitated for a moment, then lifted their entwined hands up onto the table. Considering all he was doing was sitting still, he thought his heart was beating far too quickly.

Jensen blinked down at their joined hands for a few moments and then he abruptly threw his head back and laughed, clapping once.

Steve glared, his fingers tensing in Chris'. "The hell are you laughin' at?" he growled.

"Sorry," Jensen said, trying to compose himself. "It's just... That's it?"

Chris smiled, kicking Jensen under the table. "You say anything that sounds remotely like 'I told you so' and I swear to God I'm hitting you in front of your boyfriend - and mine."

Jensen only laughed harder. "Guys, c'mon. Seriously. You really thought I didn't know?" He paused, eyes twinkling, a huge grin on his face as he looked at them knowingly. "Five months."

Jared snorted, patting Jensen on top of the head. "Be careful now."

Chris opened and closed his mouth a few times, then glanced sideways at an equally disbelieving Steve.

"You've been watching 'The Prestige' again, haven't you?" he tried, glaring at Jensen’s smug smirk.

"I'm not the only transparent one here." Jensen smirked wider. "And I've actually been waiting for it to happen for much longer than five months. I'm really happy for you guys," he said, his grin softening into an affectionate smile.

Steve gave an unusually shy smile back. "Thanks," he said awkwardly.

Chris' smile threatened to split his face in two. He squeezed Steve's hand before turning back to Jensen. "Well, you came this close to say 'I told you so', but since we’re supposed to be having a happy night, I’m not gonna hit you." He laughed and, without thinking, turned Steve around to place a quick peck on his lips.

Steve was so stunned that he couldn’t respond; his eyes just widened.

Jensen laughed. "Are you sure it's been five months already? Looks like five weeks to me."

Chris rolled his shoulders as if he was trying to get rid of a kink. "I guess you've stunned him into silence; extra points to you." He smiled, disentangling his fingers from Steve's as he started on his food.

He hadn't even lifted his fork halfway to his mouth before Steve grabbed his face in his hands and crushed their lips together.

Jensen smiled widely, but the smile froze on his lips when he turned to Jared and noticed he had got even paler. "Jay?" he whispered.

Jared just shook his head, unseeing eyes fixed forward.

Steve had released Chris' mouth, finally remembering that making out at a dinner table was not the polite thing to do. Chris was laughing throatily at him, one arm curled around his neck, when Jared couldn't hold it back anymore. He bolted from the table, chair falling back with a clunk as he all but raced out of the door and down the hall.

"What the hell?" Chris said, standing up quickly as he watched Jensen's eyes widen.

"Jared!" Jensen shouted in alarm, rushing to the bathroom. Jared was on his knees in front of the toilet, emptying the contents of his stomach, which soon led into dry heaving when there was nothing left. "Jay, hey," he said soothingly, crouching down next to him and rubbing his back.

Steve took one look at Jared and ran back to the kitchen to get a glass of water and a few damp towels.

"'m sorry man," Jared croaked, then promptly turned to heave again. "I swear - 's got - nothing - to do with you." He tried to smile, but his stomach rolled unmercifully again and he coughed some more. "I'm - really happy for you," he said weakly, leaning his forehead against Jensen's supporting hand.

Chris shook his head, crouching down himself and patting the kid's back sympathetically. "Don't mention it. It's okay." He looked up at Jensen.

Jensen swallowed hard and looked away quickly, gaze going back down to Jared, rubbing his thumb over Jared’s temple as he supported his forehead. "It's okay," he soothed. "It'll be over in a minute, you'll see."

Steve rushed back in and Jensen took the damp cloth with a grateful nod, placing it against Jared's forehead and holding it there. "Almost done, I'm sure."

Jared groaned as the familiar, foul taste filled his mouth, and he spat pitifully into the toilet again. 'You said that yesterday, too,' he thought dazedly. 'And the day before that. And before that too.' His stomach curled in on itself, making Jared bend almost in two with a moan.

Chris let out a low breath, locking eyes with Steve above their friends' heads. Steve was frowning; it had only taken one look for him to recognize this for what it was, and he had half a mind to fly up to Vancouver and kick the whole Supernatural production's asses.

"Okay," Jensen said, voice breaking a little as guilt squeezed his gut. He pressed his mouth to Jared's hair. "It'll be okay. I'm taking you to the hospital once this spell's over, okay? It'll be all right."

"I don't -" Jared sucked in a shaky breath. "Jen - we talked - about this. Please - I don't - " Another heave, and Jared was choking a little. "I don't want a hospital, Jen." He gripped the toilet seat so hard his knuckles turned white. 'I'm home. It'll be okay. We've got a week. It'll be okay.'

"I'm not letting you do this anymore, Jay," Jensen said, gently but firmly. "You need to get yourself checked out."

"He's right, Jay," Chris spoke softly from beside them. "You should take care of it before it gets worse." He nudged Jensen's shoulder with his own, one look asking all too clearly, 'How long?'

“Four days,” Jensen mouthed back.

Chris helped Jared up gently, arms sliding under the kid’s armpits to steady him. Steve stepped in on the other side to make sure Jared didn’t simply keel over and pass out.

"Don't wanna go," Jared mumbled thickly, trying to dig his heels in. "Steve," he pleaded as he saw Steve's face swimming in front of him. "They'll make me stop if - we can't stop - we can't. We've got to get the job done.”

Jensen's fists clenched so hard that his knuckles turned white, and he was glad he standing behind Jared so that his lover wouldn't see him shaking.

Steve reached out and put his hand on Jared's nape. "They'll have you fixed in no time, Jay," he soothed. "Then you can keep on doing your job just fine."

Chris's jaw tightened. He looked over at Jensen's shaking frame again, knowing his friend well enough to read him. He could see the anger, frustration and worry all simmering behind the somewhat calm facade he was showing for Jared's benefit.

He nodded for Steve to go and get the truck ready while they maneuvered Jared out of the bathroom, lying him down on the couch.

"Jen." Jared's breath was getting erratic, his sweaty hand reaching to grip Jensen's. "Jen," he whined again, closing his eyes as another wave of nausea took hold of him.

"Shhh," Jensen soothed, squeezing his hand back. "I'm right here. It's okay."

It took them a while to get Jared out of the house and into the car, but finally they managed. Jensen settled in the backseat, holding Jared tightly against him, half in his lap. "You're gonna be just fine, you'll see," he murmured into Jared's hair.

Steve waited for Chris to climb into the passenger seat before he slammed his foot hard on the accelerator.

"Make sure you get us to the ER in a one piece, thanks," Chris muttered, buckling himself up as Steve hit a sharp curve, pulling at the brakes and leaving angry black marks on the street. He glanced behind them and felt a sudden, urgent desire to book a flight to Vancouver and kill someone. "Jen, how long have you been working exactly?" he asked in a low voice.

Jensen shook his head, hating the lump that had formed in his throat and the frustrated tears that were filling his eyes as he partially hid his face in Jared's hair. 'I should have forced him to go to a doctor before,' he thought angrily. 'I should have taken better care of him.'

"Jen, don't you dare blame yourself," Chris said sternly when Jensen didn’t respond at all. "It's no one's fault but those fuckers', okay?"

"Chris, leave him alone," Steve said quietly. One look at Jensen's still slightly trembling form told him this wasn't a good time to press anything.

Chris sighed and leaned back into his seat, slamming a fist down on to his knee. "Dammit," he whispered angrily, just staring ahead.

Steve groped for Chris' hand and squeezed it when he found it, his eyes fixed on the road. Chris squeezed Steve's fingers back worriedly, biting his lip as he thought of all the possible ways to fix all this. He rubbed his thumb over the back of Steve's hand.

"We're almost there, Jay," Jensen was whispering quietly to Jared in the backseat. "Almost there. You'll be okay in no time."

Jared didn't dare believe him. He felt feverish and spent, his body shaking as though he was having some kind of seizure. He lifted his hand weakly to grasp Jensen's as his eyes rolled back in his head.

“STEVE!" Jensen cried in alarm as he found himself looking at the whites of Jared's eyes before they closed. "Steve, go faster!" he shouted, voice breaking.

Steve jumped and slammed his foot down on the pedal again. "Fuck."

"What the fuck?" Chris cried out, turning in his seat, eyes widening when he saw Jared's mile long body shaking convulsively against Jensen, eyes squeezed shut. "Jesus fucking Christ." He reached out to touch Jared's clammy forehead. He was shaking so badly that Chris had to be so careful not to stick his fingers into the kid's eyes.

"Jensen, are you sure it's been just four days?" he asked very seriously as the ER department came into view.

Jensen nodded, clutching Jared tightly to him.

"No, no, no," he said as Jared's eyes rolled again, tears now streaming down his face. "Please... Jay, please... Stay with me... C'mon... Stay with me... Look, we're here... Jay, we're here... Please..."

"Help me," Chris called to Steve as Steve pulled the brake on the car, almost crashing into the building.

Paramedics were already running towards them, obviously knowing that a speeding truck stopping with a loud, tire-wrenching screech in front of their door meant business.

Chris pulled the door of the car open before Steve helped Jensen half-push, half-carry Jared out of the backseat.

"Hurry!" Chris shouted to one of the orange-dressed men. "Nausea - stress, probably – and he had full seizure about a minute ago," he said, answering the questioning glance the man threw his way.

"Fever fit-induced convulsions," the paramedic said immediately. He looked over to the others and nodded. "Okay, people, let's move it."

They rushed Jared into the hospital, through the hallways and into an emergency room. A nurse stopped Jensen from following, putting a hand to his chest. "Sir, I’m afraid you need to wait here. We'll let you know his condition as soon as possible."

"I gotta go with him," Jensen mumbled numbly.

"Roxana," Chris said, reading the name on the tag. He gave the woman his most charming smile as he stepped forward. "He won't do anything rash. Really. He's just worried and if you make him wait outside he's going to break in or something, and that would be rash." He smiled again, watching the woman flush under his gaze.

Steve pretended to choke behind her, trying to look disgusted, but Chris could see the gratefulness and amusement in his eyes.

The woman looked unconvinced for a moment, before finally taking pity on Jensen, who was still shaking, staring blankly at the door they’d taken Jared through. "All right. Just - don't get into the operating area, all right? You'll do more harm than good."

Jensen nodded, throwing a grateful look at Chris before following her.

Chris sighed as he saw the door swing closed behind Jensen. He suddenly threw himself against Steve, wrapping his arms tightly around Steve’s waist and burying his face in his chest.

Steve wrapped his own arms around Chris without hesitating, one hand going to caress his hair soothingly. "He'll be okay," he said quietly.

"I fucking hate it," Chris said venomously, his arms flexing around his boyfriend. "Christ, did you hear what he was saying?"

“Yeah," Steve said roughly, Jared's pleas echoing in his ears.

"This is so fucked up," Chris muttered, anger burning through him like wildfire. He lifted his head a little to meet Steve's eyes. "What do you think’s wrong?"

"He's overworked that's what," Steve stated confidently.

"Yeah, but fuck - talk about being over worked. The kid was having a seizure, for fuck’s sake." He hid his face in Steve's shirt again. "They can’t get away with that."

"It's a fever fit," Steve corrected, rubbing Chris' back soothingly. "'s different." He tightened his arms. "They won’t get away with it, just wait and see. As soon as Jensen gets over the shock, he'll have their heads on a plate."

Chris chuckled, and the vibrations spread from where he was nestled against Steve to every part of Steve’s body.

"I bet. And anyway, fit or seizure… It’s all the same to me.” He sighed. “I still don't get it. I mean, I know they're pressured and everything, but I’ve never seen either of them looking this bad. And Jay - " He closed his eyes briefly. "Fuck, if anything happens to him, Jensen’s going to murder someone; I know he will.”

"Nothing will happen to Jared," Steve said again. "At least, nothing more than this. Trust me," he said, looking down at Chris. "I've seen something like this before."

Chris frowned up at him, straightening his back and finally letting go of Steve as he motioned for the both of them to sit down. "When? And to who?"

Steve complied and lifted an arm for Chris to nestle back against him, stroking Chris’ cheekbone with a thumb when Chris did.

"Me," he said quietly.

Chris turned around so fast he almost pulled something. "When?" 'And where the hell was I?'

Steve shrugged. "Doesn't matter right now," he dismissed. "What matters is that Jared will be okay."

“It fucking does matter. It matters a hell of a lot. It matters to me and you'd better fucking spill it right the fuck NOW!"

Steve's eyes hardened instantly. "Don't give me orders, Chris," he said coldly.

“And don’t keep something like this from me,” Chris retorted angrily.

"You weren't there," Steve spat. "Okay? None of your business.”

Chris' breath caught in his throat and he looked away, laughing humorlessly under his breath.

“What?” Steve growled.

"This is just so typical," Chris said, without turning. "You’re pissed at me for days on end because I asked you to keep what we have private for a while longer, to keep it between us, and you're still bottling shit up where I can't get to it."

Steve saw red. "Don't you dare throw that in my face," he spat angrily, blue eyes blazing. "Not when it’s about this." He didn't want to talk about this with Chris no matter how much pissed Chris got.

"Right. Carry on not talking and then ask me again why I sometimes don't want to talk about shit, either. That’s fair."

Steve's jaw clenched dangerously, a sure sign that he was reaching his boiling point, which really didn’t happen often. "Fuck you," he hissed, getting up and stalking away to lean against the wall, looking furiously down at the floor.

Chris knew better than try and reach for Steve when he was in this sort of mood. He crossed his boots in front of him, his own jaw set and his eyes fixed on the closed emergency room door. He felt angry and betrayed - and worried like shit on top of everything else - and he was not going to play nice. Not at all.


feeling: busybusy
singing along to : Garry Schyman - Praan
May: Kane-Steve and Chrismikeyrhcp on July 15th, 2008 04:22 pm (UTC)
OMG poor Jared. And you really got me interested in what happened to steve...

Really loved it and can't wait for the next chapter! <3
Soniafallonblackdays on July 16th, 2008 10:04 am (UTC)
Thanks! I'm so happy you like it! :) It'll be a long while before you'll know about Steve tho. ;)
Maymikeyrhcp on July 16th, 2008 10:22 am (UTC)
Well, I'm more then glad to stick around and wait for it! :D